My mother was very similar except she never kept control and usually ended up beating the shit out of me in front of my 4 younger siblings. My dad buried his head in the sand and pretended there was no abuse in the home. My anxiety is through the roof and nearly off the official charts. My husband and I are not spanking and none of my siblings or cousins do either, with one exception who it is extremely uncomfortable to be around bc of the way she treats her kids. They look like kicked dogs in the eyes. Yesterday, an uncle who lives far away from many of us was in town for my grandfathers funeral. He absolutely unloaded on me for my beliefs and told me not everyone shared my opinion, in front of his wife and adult daughters. No one said a word and I apologized for so greatly offending him. He’s NEVER treated me like this in the past. It was shocking. These people KNOW what they’ve done to their children is wrong, but it would make them fucking sick to admit it and what they’ve done. His two adult daughters went on summer long road trips and immediately to college after graduating high school and never moved back.

This whole exchange started after my mom brought up gentle parenting and how happy she is that people don’t really spank much anymore.She has deconstructed and is one of the coolest people I know. We have made amends.