I can’t think of a single reason why you married this man. Like wow… I feel for you OP. I hope you can learn from this experience that putting band aid on a shit pile doesn’t make it magically go away. He was a terrible person from start, and yet not only you gave him 10 years of your life but marriage too. Wow. I hope you can see your loss in all of this and make a stand to treat yourself better. There is no reason to ever let someone who treats you like this be around you, let alone spend 10 years with them and proceed to marry them. Just.. wow. I am completely at loss for words because I have seen a lot of fucked up stuff women bend over backwards in believing on this sub and this has to take the top 3 spot. Please understand I am not blaming you, I am just saying.. in a more stern and no nonsense way .. that you deserve better. Heck you deserved better 10 years ago too. Please save yourself, there’s still time.