I don't know if this is going to come off as creepy in any way but I know a lot of people here feel the same way you do so I feel like maybe a transparent conversation might give everyone some insight into both perspectives.

So hi everyone! Aforementioned SO here. Please trust me when I say I'm not a stalker. We both know each others Reddit names and I'll tell her in the morning I responded here.

Moving on, my first (and possibly most shocking point) is that I feel this way too. You are my favorite human and best friend and I miss hanging out like we used to. It's hard to know you're upstairs asleep or feeling crummy while I'm having an alright time but the fact is I don't deal with any of the physical aspects of child bearing. I'm not tired at 7pm. So I stay up and do my normal thing, Netflix or video games with the roommates. I can't change this part, but I try my best with things like tucking you in no matter what we're doing (even on nights we drink) and triple check ing that you have everything you need to be comfortable. If I'm around I usually never just dismiss you going to sleep, but maybe we can try a little pre bed snuggle time before I head back down?

My second point is that we hang out on the couch when we are together recently because I was going through some really hard finals at school and ensuring my job for the summer was set so my brain was just tired. I was willing to do anything but I would be lying if I said it wasn't nice to just sit near you for a bit. So much demand from everything on top of proactively taking care of you is exhausting. Not unwanted mind you, I'm loving this weird adventure we've found ourselves in, but it's exhausting. I get you're tired too but if you're at home resting during the day or on your phone, maybe a suggestion or a list of potential activities might truly help me out here. We can decide together but it shows ME that you truly want to hang out with ME, not just say "I dunno I'm tired". Cause then I think "a relaxing evening on the couch it is!" I know you truly are tired but if you want out of the house you gotta let me know, even if you just say "I don't care just get me outta here!"

Lastly, I wanted to say that there is going to come a time when you gotta do stuff on your own. My upcoming work schedule will be non conducive to weekday hangout time. This job is an absolute necessity so it is what it is. You need to be able to hang out with and entertain yourself or I think you'll find yourself in that "bored housewife" state. The house feels like a prison and you forget what's outside the walls so go take pictures! Go to your secret bookstores! Do the things you did when we were dating but not living together like walks downtown or hanging out with friends, It's ok! I trust that you're not gonna just dip out for some guy (he'd be in for a surprise!) and I'm absolutely ok with you doing stuff for you! My 11pm video game time is for me. You're fast asleep, the roommates aren't being loud or trying to hangout, the night is quiet around this neighborhood and I can just turn off my brain and reset after it all. You absolutely deserve that time too but you gotta find what works for you within your schedule. Take care of yourself love, you never know when you're gonna need you! (A friend of mine said that to me once.)

I love you unconditionally and we will all get through this wonky stage and laugh about that time we used to have free time before we had kids.