You're talking about the "having your cake and eating it too" about the satanic image and name - one of the things that made me start to lose respect for tst members is the constant whining about being oppressed for being a satanist. It is so strange to me that so much of the literature and convos around tst satanism is about empowerment and taking ownership of your life when there is so much victimhood in the way that people talk and act. After a few years I was like this is never going to end, people are going to play the victim card forever and it is mind boggling to me. "Poor me, I'm a satanist and I'm misunderstood and being persecuted by everyone". Gtfo. At some point I realized it is such a hive mind too. And yes, it seems that they're willing to sue or at the very least bully out anyone who says something slightly negative about tst or Lucien. And through the years I've seen Lucien go after people online, even loyal members; when he's pissed at someone, he will make an example out of them. He will bully them, then he gets praised for it and others will join in and bully that person until they leave the 'community'. I've seen this go down oh so many fucking times on twitter. And yet he says that he gets so much criticism that he's accustomed to it and handles it etc, but what he says and what he does are 2 different things entirely. I used to love Lucien, but seeing him act this way made me wonder is that man so fragile that he gets triggered or destroyed every time he gets a tweet that is not a praise? The way he reacts is just so immature and petty; I don't want a leader like that. Another thing that didn't sit well with me is how proud we are to be non-theistic, right; yet, members idolize Lucien. So ok, we don't worship a god but Lucien is worshipped. And anyone who questions him is cast out. He's put on a pedestal and rules don't apply to him and it seems really hypocritical.

Temple was the last thing for me regarding the hive mind culture. I was never in love with the idea of Temple, to me, it's basically the equivalent of going to Christian church; maybe I'm too much of an anarchist for this but I don't like the idea of Ministry and Ministers. After everything I saw I was already conflicted, honestly, I was sinking into a burnout and depression, I didn't know it then but that's how much everything tst was impacting my life and my health. But when I saw Temple? I was like nope, no way, I'm out. This obligation of becoming a Minister in order to lead congregations and basically have a leadership role, have your voice heard and prioritized over others voices? Imo, this is flat-out unethical. Attending a course in order to get a certification is a way to control leaders in place and who is a leader and control congregations. It's like distributing privilege upon meeting conditions. What is this, an obedient servants brainwashing factory? I've heard some people talk about their satanic "faith" and I was thinking wtf are you even talking about? Will someone next say "have you heard about our lord and savior, satan?" This is just like the goddamn church, it is becoming everything that I'm trying to escape from, a capitalist church of brainwashed mouth pieces who all recite the same piece of text in front of an audience who follows like sheep and opens their wallets. If people get something out of Temple, power to them but I personally never understood it. I ended up leaving and it was hard, man. From one day to the next I was completely alone. When I found tst many years ago I was like this is awesome, I found my family. And I did find a few really good people. But the thing itself is an illusion, it's what they're selling.

Ultimately you're going to have to decide for yourself if your experience works for you or not. Trust yourself; you know what your values are and how you feel. If you do decide to leave, I would recommend not picking a fight or talking badly publicly about them and I say this because you're the one who will get hurt by this. Save yourself some grief, cause it's not worth it. If you decide to stay, you might have to adapt your thinking a bit or you will be frustrated and unhappy. I had asked friends how they deal with the bs and some say they choose to not get involved at national level, they ignore leadership and they focus on their congregation or their inner group of friends.

Sometimes I ask myself do I miss tst and the answer always end up being no because in the end it was never what I thought it was. What I miss is something that never really existed. Lucien is right when he says tst is not for everyone. But the problem is, they don't show tst as it is, so what people think tst is, is their first impression or what they would like it to be. And it circles back to what you said: tst needing to decide what it is. But they'll never do that in the way that you wish they would. They don't go in courts to win, they go in courts to campaign for money. That's how they get the most of their income, that's their bread and butter. They've already decided what they are, they're a business. But they won't position themselves because tst needs to be ambiguous in order for it to work; to attract as many people as possible, so that people will only see in it what works for them, and also so they're able to change the rules at will for their benefit and no one can say anything about it ever. I remember at some point one of the tenets saying something along the lines of allowing ourselves to be ever changing, meaning that we're allowed to change, grow but also meaning that the tenets could be re-written, perhaps this was in the extrapolation of tenet VII - I cannot find the reference for it now so I'm guessing it was re-written, how convenient and ironic. But what I wanted to say was when I saw that tenet I thought how fitting. In theory it sounds nice but in practice it means that they can't be held to their word ever and there is zero accountability. And there isn't a single thing we can do about it because tst is not ours, it is a privately owned company and we have no say in what it does or doesn't do. When Lucien said tst is not for everyone, that was literal - it is literally not for everyone, it is only for the individuals who own it.

Good luck to you and all the best.