Ok, I'm going to tell you a little story about myself as a child, so you can try to understand what makes people think about doing, or doing something like this.

On paper, I am a privileged person. My family were wealthy and I went to expensive and well-regarded private schools.

However, my father was a violent and angry sexual abuser who kept me in fear. My mother was a narcissist who treated me like a slave. Every now and then she would get rid of all my belongings, not as a punishment, just because she had some weird OCD. One day she had my dog put down for being 'annoying.' My father would find any excuse to engage his rage. Imagine, if you will, what it might feel like if your 'flight or fight' response was turned on at around 5 or 6 years of age, and never got turned off. Even to this day.

My schools knew of the abuse and did nothing. It wasn't until secondary school that anyone gave enough of a fuck about me to realise I needed glasses, previously I had been told that I 'wasn't concentrating enough.' As someone who wasn't even treated as human by his parents, it was difficult for me to socialise, and I was a 'problem.' Other children bullied and beat me, and I had no place to feel safe. At all. I overreacted a lot, but I was in constant panic mode which needed consideration, love, time, and safety to fix. No one gave me any of those things.

So, one day, I filled my school bag with knives. Lots of big, sharp kitchen knives. If no one was going to give me the space and safety I needed, I would have to do it myself. Once I got to school, a few kids started to push me around before first period, so I opened my bag and showed them the knives. They stopped immediately, word went round the schoolboys, and I was left alone for the entire rest of the term. It was bliss.

Would I have used them, however? Definitely.