I always had anxiety, like before going out, talking to people and so on. Then I met my ex girlfriend and everything was perfect, but when it ended I lost my new confidence, most of my "friends" (they told me she cheated on me, turned out it was not true they just didn't like "how I changed because of her and she is using me") and my girlfriend.

I was then in a dark place, but returned to my first love football. I decided to go to games alone (big step for me). I didn't miss a single home game of my two teams (local club+first division club) and didn't make any friends but people greet me and stuff, drink a beer with them - just talk about football.

Now I'm worried that I'm falling back my old self.. Last weekend I went out with an old friend, had a few beer and some girl approaches me. Asks me if I had a girlfriend - " No." - "Oh, why not? You rly cute" And I just froze, no idea what happened next but yeah she left.

Tomorrow I'll try to go out with my brother and sunday it's the Ute Bock Cup, like a charity tournament to help refugees and homeless people at the Sport-Club Platz. That's the plan anyway.. My anxiety is still there, but I'm trying to fight it.

Just needed to share