Gamers of Reddit, what crazy story happened to you in an online game?

Of course the human warrior had no money, had little more than an empty backpack, given to him by some benevolent soul, who’d seen him drowning in a small well, and suggested he swim up instead of down, and then given him a backpack as consolation for his idiocy. And too he had a child’s sword, capable of slaying only the weakest monsters, and a tunic given to him by some warrior who to this day he still couldn’t say for sure was a man or an npc. Having traveled across the entire continent to the tunnel, where all the trading of the land took place, he begged and pleaded with every race and every class he saw, from enchanters who’d turned themselves into piles of shit, to druids as spinning trees, to crossdressing dwarves, to gnomes who lived in perpetual terror of pederastic barbarians, to arrogant and aloof high elves with resting bitch faces. All these he begged from and all these refused or ignored him. It was then he came across the Ogre, fat and nearly naked. He begged the Ogre and the Ogre said, No, you dance if you want item.

How? he asked.

/dance.

So he /danced. He became a human warrior whore. He sold his body for items. For a Bronze Helm and Banded Boots, and he was happy, for about two minutes, until he opened his inventory and saw once again how little he had, how poor he was. So he poked the Ogre, begged and danced. But the Ogre ignored him. Finally, after some minutes, the Ogre said, OK, I give you Fine Plate Greaves if you complete quest. Run deep into tunnel, past torches, until you come to man call Shady Swashbuckler. Attack and return.

He ran past the torches, found the Shady Swashbuckler, and attacked him, and was immediately killed. He found himself once again in his starting city, naked. It took him a week to run back across the continent and by the time he returned to the tunnel his corpse had decayed with all his items.

He leveled. He slew great enemies, orc peons and orc emperors, ghouls and banshees, aviaks and centaurs. All the undead and goblins in this world were his for the killing, and he grew stronger. Fuck you Ogre, he thought, with each attack, with each bash and taunt and kick, which were really his only abilities. He died and died again. Death emboldened him, an implacable anger bounded only by his level.

It happened that after three months, and through an autistic focus he hadn’t known he possessed, that he reached level 45. And it was here, by fate or fortune, that he found the justice he’d been seeking. Weeks before, he’d befriended a half-elf bard, a singer of songs and charmer of enemies. And it was in a place called HighPass Keep that he happened upon the Ogre killing guards, the Ogre, no longer naked, now armored in cobalt, and he called his bard friend, who knew of his early whoring, and the bard challenged the Ogre to a duel and the Ogre, arrogant and foolish, accepted. The bard immediately charmed the Ogre, for this was a time when charm still worked in duels, and the bard said, Follow me pet, and the pet Ogre followed. The Bard told the Ogre to attack the highest level npc in the zone, Ran Flamespinner, who slew the Ogre in three blows and vengeance was satisfied.

/r/AskReddit Thread