She is not my first long-term partner, neither am I hers.

I am a very caring person by nature and I dont want to drop that, but want the same for me and that is where it falls short lately. I have been told by the aforementioned close friends that I can be too caring and that my romantic partners then get lazy because in the game of chicken around "Work sucks, let's starve" I am the first to flinch and pick up my own ass to get shit done. Same with laundy and so an... I want/need to look professional for work so I need to do laundry, so I throw her things in there as well. And while I am already ironing my shirts, might as well do hers... and so on. I'm more an "Acts of Service" person if we go by the languages of love, but the risk of those things being taken for granted is alwasy present.

What I have described are the topics that upset me / irk me.

Not present are the times when a chronic illness really fucks me up on the regular (long story, neck injury leading to cluster migraines) and she is amazing, understanding and caring for me.

Same goes for the time we spend together: It's always an adventure and time well spent and I wouldnt want to spend it with anyone else.

So what I want is for her to go back to putting the effort, I dont want to drop all the joy, laughter and mental support she brings into my life only to bang some more. Not worth it in the long run in my opinion.