I've been there. I have been where you are. I have been in a very, very dark place. I unpacked, camped out out and lived there for a vert long time. It was horrible, I wouldn't wish that shit on my worst enemy. The thing to remember is.. Everyone has shit to deal with, to you someone's else's shit seems like nothing compared to yours... Just like your shit may seem like nothing to someone who has it far worse. We all have one thing in common.. We don't like where it is that we are at the present time. Ok, well good for you.. That is step one.dont minimize your ability in making that step because it's a big one. A lot of sheeple don't even REALiSE that there is possibly a better alternative out there. Some people have allowed life to beat them into submission and give up. That's not you. Congratulations. Next step..figures get out what you WANT to do. If you could make your perfect job, what would it be? Really think about it. What are you good at? Work from there. You don't have to figure it all out at once, just make small steps to you goal every day and then bigger ones. Then still even bigger ones... Then you're there. Just reverse engineer the shit out this..does that make sense? Like when you put together Lego as a kid. the millennium falcon kit comes with a picture on the box, but if you lose the instructions..you have to really eyeball that shit to figure it out, but you do. i dont know if all this has helped or not.. Just don't give up. Things get better. It sounds like you have a good source of emotional support in your girlfriend, so I have faith that you'll get over this rough patch..and that's all it is, a bit of rough road that's best left in your rear view mirror. You can do this. Also, if I didn't help..there's (this dude)[http://youtu.be/AFGWnqNf6t0]