I was forced into no fap. Back in April I had surgery to remove a lump from my left nut. Needless to say I couldn't fuck or beat my dick like it owes me money for 16 days.

I'll give you a break down of my no fap recovery:

D-minus 1: nurse calls me. Tells me to wear pajamas or loose fitting shorts.

D-day: Go in for surgery prep. I'm wearing my normal slim fit jeans because

1: No self respecting man wears pajamas in public. 2: Fuck cargo shorts.

As they doing the anesthesia my surgeon says "alright, you're gonna be walking like John Wayne." Before I could say "WHAT THE FUCK?!" I woke to nurses holding me down. Apparently as I was waking up i got really mad at Cleveland, Ohio. No idea why.

In a wheelchair chair and see my dad. I start raving about riding BMX bikes in Washington. I express my fears of Cleveland, Ohio invading. I voice my concern of the Braves roster.

Go to change into my clothes. That's when I saw the massive jock strap wrapped around me. Ride home sucked cause pops drives like Nascar on an Indy track. Got to parents place. Ate one of my mom's delicious fish tacos. Got pain killers.