First of all, shame and hatred are different things. Hating fat people is one way to make them feel ashamed and if that's all you want to accomplish here is to say that hate is unproductive, then we can just stop and agree.

My issue is that there are fat people who think that feeling shame is completely unacceptable and that society should provide them an environment where they never have to feel shame whether they want to lose weight or not. I think that it's natural for a fat person to feel shame at some point during a completely healthy and effective process of educating themselves on how to adjust their behavior to lose weight. It's just a natural human response to feel shame. And feeling shame can even be an effective motivator. What my intuition tells me, and what no study has attempted to discover, is that a method that goes out of its way to prevent feeling shame is not the most effective. Shame is an inevitable discomfort that people should be able to handle.

The studies are not getting to the bottom of this. I don't know how many there have been but I read the methods of two and the data they gather is too vague and unreliable to learn anything. They're simply saying that people who feel that they're in a discouraging environment tend to gain weight and people who don't feel that they're in a discouraging environment tend to lose it. We have no idea what their environments actually are. We don't even know if their reports on weight change are accurate. Even if a study like that was much more controlled and objective, it still wouldn't be addressing the role of shame as I've described in the previous paragraph.

I know some fat shaming really is just hate. I also know some fat people cry "fat shaming" when people really are just trying to help. It is absolutely unhelpful for you to so quickly say that I'm not trying to be helpful and that I just want to be an asshole.