I eloped, so maybe my experience is different.

My husband and I went to a city hall out of town (but not far away) to get married. We had kept our plans a secret. We had toyed with the idea of telling our families, but we both unfortunately had unexpected deaths in our families at the exact same time, just days after receiving our marriage license.

It was with those losses we decided not to tell our families. We felt the timing became inappropriate - we didn't want others to think we were doing it because of our losses, we didn't want to distract others from their grief, or stress anyone out further and make them feel obliged. We weren't going to not get married. We had already decided and planned everything out, set our date, paid for the ceremony and booked our venue. Still, we married at the far end of the month, and it had all went down in the very beginning. So, while there was time, there wasn't enough. We had memorials and funerals to plan and figure out how to pay for.

So we just went, and we got married, and we went home and told our families and went about our days. We decided to move out of state within a week of our marriage and got ready for that.

We received $100 from my husband's ex girlfriend's parents. Lol. And that was it. We originally had planned to have a reception and we were hoping to do that before moving, but with everything that happened we decided to nix that idea and never mention it.

I guess I think about it and I'm disappointed. It's not how I always thought it would be. I never got to do any wedding stuff. I also kind of feel like couples who have weddings get this great jump start in life - they receive household appliances and decorations as gifts, plus a lot receive cash gifts from family and end up with this great jump start to their new lives. My husband and I struggle every day, and always have. We bought everything for our first apartment together secondhand, or had things given to us by my sister who felt bad for us when she saw our big giant living room with a tiny love seat and 20-inch computer monitor on the floor we used to watch TV and movies.