Hey, thank you. I'm aware my future sister in law isn't taking anything away from me, because it's ultimately her mother in the end. I'm just lonely and in need of maternal support. I am upset that I won't have that full maternal support I would probably have if my alive and well mother was involved in my wedding planning.

I do my best and I will become more supportive as her pregnancy progresses, but I also don't want to just be her off-duty midwife. I would like us to have a relationship beyond that, you know? But whenever we get together we only end up talking about her baby, our jobs, or whatever her family is up to. She is the maid of honour in a non-traditional sense (we only have two people in our wedding party, no bach parties), but she's not as involved in the wedding on my side. And I'm not expecting her to be, especially now, but we don't have the relationship I wish we had. If she has a query about the wedding, she always asks her sister. But then there are some things I don't want my fiancée to know, like my dress or what I'm doing with my hair. I'm nervous to take her wedding dress shopping with me because she said she'd take a picture of my dress and show it to her sister, but my fiancée and I both want it to be a surprise. Little things like that, I don't think she fully gets it, because she's never been a big wedding person herself.

I have absolutely been thanking my future mother in law for everything she's done and is doing. She really has been incredible and she has done so much already. This will be her first grandchild and I don't want to be annoying or overstep with my wedding requests. For big things, like buying a dress, I will consider asking her. But for all those little details like the tables or the lights or the cake, I just feel like I'll be bothering her with my things when she has something much more important to worry about. Especially nearer the time. And because she's already done so much for me, I know I should give her space to celebrate something else. But then I feel lonely.