EXT4 and BTRFS both support the 'discard' mount option. EXT4 if you want the simplest most reliable filesystem tried and tested through the ages. BTRFS if you want a next generation filesystem with snapshotting and richer features. I am using BTRFS on my ssd as I want to see it become nice and mature like ZFS, and because I want the CRC checking in BTRFS that protects me against bit-rot.
I don't think its worth worrying about reducing wear by making greater use of tmpfs and moving logs onto spinning rust. Yes there used to be flash devices with abysmal write endurance, but even the consumer ssds out in recent years are turning this around.
As for a partitioning scheme I prefer "big slash" unless there are reasons to deviate (like if this was a database system, or if you couldn't boot to a massive root partition and need a little /boot partition).
I would suggest 10GB swap off your 300GB HDD, just to maintain a high water line (if you meet or exceed your physical ram you can see swap usage and decide yourself if more memory is needed or if "I was just doing something crazy that one time"). I prefer swapping a bit to just having programs killed by the out-of-memory killer in the Linux kernel. Can lower your /proc/sys/vm/swappiness if you want your system to try harder to avoid swapping.
I would put as much of your system on the ssd if you enjoy the fast access speeds. The other two hdds can be striped, mirrored, joined to a different BTRFS volume and mounted as /archives or /storage (this could be a place for media storage).
This is /r/ubuntu so I've given you information to setup ubuntu. Unclear how or why you are using windows. Why not just run it in a vm on a free hypervisor such as virtualbox? If you want to game, use your 250gb disk (not like your frame rates in games will benefit from an ssd, just load times and desktop responsiveness).