Ok so confession, I have stumbled on this whole incel thing by accident. Just to clarify, I am a woman by the way. I am curious maxscapist, after reading your above post, how do you personally envision a relationship starting if things went the way you would like them to? That is the ultimate goal right? Do you feel that if someone would respond to you that things must happen very quickly, what type of signs or behavior are "acceptable" (we'll go with that word) to you so that you feel things are going well? What behavior do you expect from a woman that you consider a potential partner? I have read a few other blog posts and watched a video or two, as I mentioned this is new for me and most of the men are commenting about the woman's reaction or behavior toward them but don't really clarify their personal expectations. I am going to comment on your above post but first I will give you a brief breakdown on who I am so you can understand better where I am coming from should you choose to engage in conversation with me. I am attractive (at least I have been told by a number of men that I am), I am not married, I was at one point, I own everything I have and have no debt, no this did not come from me cleaning my ex-husband out.....so I never looked for someone to "take care" of me, I have no kids....never really wanted any, I am educated, I work out and dress very well - I am a classy dresser not a slutty one. I have been in several long term relationships and am extremely monogamous. I have been single by choice for three years now, dated no one. Ok, so now that you have a fractional glimpse at who I am I'm going to comment on your post above. While I am a friendly, warm person I have also not responded to some men but the reasons are varied and certainly not singular in nature. I do not ignore men because they are unattractive to me. After all, attraction is relative, it is different for everyone. I do not ignore men because I think by just looking at them they are beneath me. It is not because I am a snobby bitch who thinks she is superior to you. Most of the time I don't make eye contact because I have dealt with a number of men who are just the opposite of you. You say hello back, or smile and with in a minute or so you are fighting off a come on. Some men do this somewhat inadvertently but they do it just the same. Then it gets awkward. If I am in a relationship I do not flirt with or even pay attention to other men so chances are that If it was me you were trying to make eye contact with I may or may not even respond. It has nothing........nothing to do with you. I get the fact that you claim to have experienced this with multiple women, thus your argument for being ignored. On the flip side of things...maxscapist...there have been men that I look at and think.....wow.....I would love to just be able to talk to him and don't have the nerve to do it. I understand the need for men to have sex, hell I love sex and haven't had any by choice for three years. Why? because I would rather have no sex then deal with the mountains of drama and bullshit that can follow it. Yes, men bring it too. My point is that I have been in long term monogamous relationships and the sex many times becomes ordinary even when you love that person. Or sometimes the sex just sucks, sometimes the person you care about is not that great in bed. And sometimes you just grow apart. Let me tell you that if you get in a relationship with someone, fall in love and the relationship breaks up, that is a pain that is so immense that you never want to go through again. It's like someone died, God is it gut wretching. I've been through both and honestly, I almost never want to fall in love again. It spins your whole world upside down. You think loneliness is bad, it just doesn't compare....it just doesn't, the pain for some people is mentally and physically debilitating. You can also be in a relationship with some one and be extremely lonely. Yes, that is possible I have been there. Finding someone to truly love you and "get" you is never easy. Even in my three long terms, looking back, I still feel like I have never truly found that. Have you ever really sat down and talked with some females to get insight on how they respond to men and why? I mean you are trying to attract a female, preferably a good one right? Understanding how we think is not that difficult.....yes, I know you will laugh at that.....but women are essentially in different behavioral classes just as men are. If you are looking for a classy, monogamous, educated woman maybe It would be helpful to talk to those kinds of women and find out what they want and desire. Talk to them in a curious nonchalant way and ask questions. Make it clear you are not trying to "pick them up" you just want information. You won't find many women that will reject you wanting to talk to them if you explain ahead of time the reasoning behind your questions. This is a good way to find out exactly what the fuck is in our head, so to speak :0). If you ask multiple women (the type you are trying to attract) then you come away with a more rounded perspective on their thoughts and can adjust your game plan accordingly. It is also impossible to make a good solid connection with a women who you are not friends with. Women are quite emotional and many of us, the good ones anyway, choose our sexual partners more carefully. I am this way and it is because when a woman has sex with you multiple times- unless she is a slut - she starts to become emotionally attached to you. We can't help it, that shit just happens to us. We are well aware that men can have sex multiple times with the same woman and not care about her and call it good when he's done, leaving without a second thought. We don't function that way, we have now become attached and it is a lot tougher to let go. It is why some women become clingy and that drives some men nuts. So, as a result of not wanting to go through that withdrawal and hurt of getting attached, I and others will avoid all sexual contact with you until such time we feel that you are genuine and are not a hit and run guy.....this can take different amounts of time for different women. So us not being willing to hop in bed with you early on may very well be because of that. Become her friend, yes, I know you have done that, do it again anyway, give it some time.....the better women will not hop in the sack with you right away anyway...look for signs that she is into you and then push further........if you just want to get laid, then all of the above doesn't really matter. Good luck maxscapist......