In first grade there was this one kid that I really just did not get along with. We weren't sworn enemies or anything but we didn't vibe well together. I mostly just tried to avoid him. Well, one day his favorite denim jacket went missing at school. Someone later found it behind one of the fields all ripped up and such. He assumed it must have been me and the next day I was summoned to the principal's office.

Also, just a brief backstory on that particular principal, everybody worshiped the ground she walked on. She was some world renowned philanthropist or something and regularly held school-wide assemblies to talk about her what amazing charitable thing she'd recently done. One example I can remember is when she went to Africa and talked about how she taught the children how to use pencils and how happy it made them. Everyone made her out to be some Mother Teresa-like figure.

Anyway, I got to the office and she immediately started accusing me of doing it. All she had to go on was the other kid's word but she refused to believe my innocence for even one second. For what felt like hours she basically interrogated me and made me feel like a criminal. Eventually she picked up the phone and informed me that she was calling the police to come talk to me. My six year old self was so afraid of going to jail (especially for something I didn't even do) so I quickly made up a confession and a story to go along with it. My story involved smuggling Crayola scissors from an art cubby out to the playground and cutting up the jacket.

My parents had to pay for a replacement jacket for him.

It still pisses me off the way she treated me. Her whole "look at how nice and compassionate I am" thing was nothing but an act. She apparently wasn't too bright either because who the hell would actually believe that a pair of Crayola scissors could destroy a denim jacket. Those things can't even manage to cut paper most of the time.