3. Who is the biggest shit bag you knew in the military?

Who is the biggest shit bag you knew in the military?

When I was in the military, I was doing office work and stuff right after my basic training. Well I would have if there had been literally anything to do for me. Instead I just set around in the office with two other soldiers and we basically just fucked around and tried to look busy all day. (everyone in our unit knew we were doing nothing of importance all day but no one cared because literally no one had anything to do for us)

So one day when I was super hungover and needed something to concentrate on, I just took a pencil and sharpened it until there was basically nothing left of it. I thought nothing about it, let it lay around on my desk and went to have lunch.

While I was eating this one fuckhead OR-5b (equivalent to the sergeant in US military) must have shown my lieutenant the pencil and when I returned I got SO MUCH shit for "destroying army property" and the lieutenant went on about how his pencil lasted for several deployments and that there was no way I wrote so much that this one pencil is already completely used up.

My defense was, that it fell down several times and was broken inside and was so instead of throwing it away I used it to entertain myself when there was nothing to do.

He wouldn't have any of it and said I was being "interrogated" about it by our fucking OF-5 officer (Colonel equivalent) the next day. And I also had to fill out a standard form about broken army property 5 times, which the lieutenant had to sign but he literally wrote on it that my explanation was neither credible nor rational and gave it to the colonel.

Can you imagine that? Because of a pencil?

I report for duty the next day and ask about my appointment with the colonel, which was when the lieutenant gave in and said it's canceled and tore apart the form from the previous day and threw it away.

He actually took the little pencil leftover home, drilled a hole in it so that I could put it on the chain wear it alongside my dog tag, lmao.

Funny stuff I is that that lieutenant was usually super chill and I got along with him perfectly the rest of the time.

Probably just had a bad day or whatever.

I still have that damn pencil somewhere, might post a picture if I find it

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