When I was in school, a guest speaker came and talked to us about being shot in the face point-blank by her abusive ex boyfriend.

What shocked me the most about her story was how little the police helped her (or at least that was the impression I got as a teen). She had every piece of paper that she could get. He was forbidden from being anywhere near her. She called the police every time he contacted her in violation of court orders not to. And every time... so little happened. On the police's side, that is. Obviously, something terrible happened - eventually she got shot in the face! She was lucky to live, but her face as I saw it years afterwards and after much reconstructive surgery was still very much obviously scarred from it. Anyway, I think they put him in jail a few times between him contacting her. But really, the ending almost seemed inevitable, because the papers were only useful for punishing him after he had already went against whatever they forbid, and every time he was "out" and about, him harassing her was an eventuality that just always. happened. The story was just... it was infuriating to listen to. Because it was just a string of events where that terrible outcome could have been prevented... if only this or that... mostly, if only she hadn't relied just on the police.

I wish I could remember her name, and I'm trying to find her on google (I'll edit with a link if I can). But you know what's even sadder? I keep finding other stories very much like hers - of women who left an abusive relationship and who had restraining orders and whatnot and who still ended up hurt or killed. Unfortunately, I keep coming up with all these women who got shot in the face by an abusive ex, and I'm not really sure which one was the one I met!!

Please, oh gahd please, do not let that peice of paper make you feel safe. It's greatest use is being brought up after he violates it. If he wants to hurt you, he will do so.