The ones that I worry about in that way are the ones that are highly likely to end up in the hospital, jail, or the morgue. My brother falls under all 3 of these categories. That's why I check in on him multiple times a day. I don't do that with anyone else really unless they travel long distances. It's kind of like when you ask someone to text you when their plane lands or when they get home if the road conditions are bad. I'm not like this with my mom or roommates, for example. I'll go days without seeing or hearing from them.

And about my comment earlier about me not wanting to cause a problem but ending up creating one for myself. It probably doesn't help my case but that isn't exclusive to just this type of situation. I overthink haha. I think of the worst case scenario and try to figure out how to avoid it or fix it before it's happened, even if it probably won't. Sometimes it's a good thing but this is not one of those times.

I do feel the need to say that I'm not some asshole that planned to hide all this and then spring up on her after she'd developed feelings and say "hey I'm a piece of shit with all these problems." She asked what my biggest weakness was and I told her that this right here was it. This is me at my weakest. So if she decided she wasn't into me like you said, this is probably why.

I guess I should start looking into therapists when I wake up.