Was asserting yourself something that was encouraged for you, or was it discouraged?
Is asserting yourself encouraged for any kid? You correct the teacher, they put you outside. You talk back to the other kids, they smack you across the face. You argue with your parents, you're sent to bed without food. Pretty sure every kid is taught to shut up and listen. In any case, no, I was not taught to assert myself, but I don't think that's a problem even remotely unique to me.
And now that you have a decent chunk of my childhood story, how are you going to dismiss that too? Because, I'll tell you, I check more boxes on that list than my sister does. So if she were to play Magic, her experiences would be less representative of cis women than mine. According to you.
(And no, I'm not posting about my childhood to complain. I have other avenues for doing that. But when you decide to use empty arguments like those to pretend that you have any idea what my life has been like, I'm going to correct you. I'd still love to know how childhood experiences = playing Magic as an adult.)
(FWIW, I was discussing this conversation with a friend of mine who was driving me to work. Literally, the first thing she said was, "How can she be an authority on the experiences women? Has she even had a period?")
And we're back to "trans women aren't really women, but I still totally respect your identity". How are periods relevant to playing Magic again?
You probably don't like the insinuation.
I don't understand the insinuation, rather.
But none of this changes the fact that there is far too much weight behind the claims of sexism (even anecdotal) to suggest that women are just exaggerating or ignorant.
Yes, there are assholes in the Magic community. Crackgate, while something I found amusing, was a somewhat assholish thing to do. It didn't target women, though, it targeted overweight men. Or the constant talk of body odor problems on this very sub. Some people have genuine medical problems causing bad BO. While Crackgate was something that plenty of people here had a strong reaction to, I don't see anyone defending the people who smell bad. Or heck. The guys who think it's okay to walk up to a girl and just ask for her number without knowing her. They probably can't help it. They're most likely socially awkward and don't know how what they're doing affects people. All of these things are issues, but they're issues that are easily fixed: If you see anything like that, simply walk up and talk to the person. I'd say that most Magic players are pretty nice people and only a small minority are actually genuinely assholes. The answer here is simply to tell most people why what they're doing is a problem and tell the assholes to cut it out or leave. It is not to focus specifically on one group and say "These people need protection above all others!". That's stupid. There are plenty of groups within the Magic community that are made to feel uncomfortable by the socially unconscious or just mere unpleasant individuals. Focusing on one group to the near-exclusion of all others makes no sense.
You keep presenting yourself as someone who knows women's situation better than most women do. Is it that you believe you're more of a woman than someone who hasn't had the choice? Are you the "real woman" having to put other womens' experiences in context for them?
Like I've stated repeatedly, I've tried both sides and can compare the two, something that cis women simply can't do. My experiences give me a perspective that they will not have unless they try to crossdress and go to a store where no one knows them to see what happens. And I urge cis women to try this, just to see what happens. I think they'd find that the experiences aren't as different as they think.
Here's the issue I have with that. I've listened to many, many, many women about sexism. (Women are more than happy to talk about their situation if they feel it's safe to do so.) And the one thing I've learned more than any other? Women know their shit. They often get pigeonholed as being blind to what's around them - usually by men
What a supremely ironic statement, coming from a man and addressed at a woman (Not a real one, tho, cuz no period), in a series of posts telling her why her opinion doesn't matter.
Again, could you please tell me how you are not "man-splaining" with this? I'd love to know how you justify being a man who speaks for and over women, while still retaining your view that such a thing is not okay.
But given that you put qualifiers on other women's experiences and suggest they're simply mistaken about what they see, it doesn't sound that mutual.
Again, incredibly ironic. You're the one claiming that trans women's experiences don't count because you said so and they're probably ugly and incapable of passing anyways.
But given that you put qualifiers on other women's experiences and suggest they're simply mistaken about what they see, it doesn't sound that mutual.
I am suggesting a different perspective on things from the common one of sexism and saying "Hey, maybe this is what's going on". You're the one trying to tell me why everything I say is invalid because I don't get menstrual cramps.