Things are a little different when they are new to a house, you should probably read up on how to help the cat adjust to a new place, this is assuming the cat is already used to your house.

Think of a cat like a person instead of a pet, all cats are independant. An independant cat isn't like living with a complete stranger, it's more like living with a family member. Sometimes you hang out together (for a cat that means cuddles) sometimes you don't. It's a long term thing, when your family are busy for a whole day it doesnt mean they are indifferent to you, the same is true for cats. If you haven't spent much time with cats, you probably havn't seen the other side of it where they want to hang out with you.

When people say "let the cat engage you at it's own speed" they don't mean ignore the cat completely until it comes to you, they just mean that you always let the cat choose. You shouldn't just pick a cat up whenever you feel like it, you call the cat over and tap your lap then let the cat decide to hop up. Usually they will. If the cat hops off your lap after a few minutes then maybe you were patting too much.

There are a couple of things that are useful to know about cats. When cats meet other cats, they sniff noses it's kind of a polite hello. The human->cat equivalent when meeting a new cat is to hold out your hand and let the cat sniff before you try and touch the cat. If the cat pulls away, let it. The other thing is that height is important to cats, the difference in height is like how much of an advantage/disadvantage the cat feels, so it's best to crouch down when meeting cats and to give them a high place to hang out in your house (usually a scratching post).

The main thing to remember is they don't like being held/trapped and they don't want you to hassle them all the time, that includes trying to train them to be more cuddly. Just don't force them into anything. The funny thing about cats is that they like people that leave them alone the most, which is usually people like your dad.