Yeah it's something I get anxious about sometimes. Over the years I've said and done very stupid things, like anyone has I suppose. I had a few brushes with high society types and basically realized that a)the window to do "big" things was there, b) i'm not big thing material, and c) if changed and became big thing material someone would inevitably dig that stuff up and either ruin it or just stain my reputation.

i think a lot of it comes from the ego-this idea that I am the main character and someday will be a person you care about this much. that's really not the case. i'm smart but not that smart, people like me but not that much etc. i'm a normal dude-I am not getting that high profile in the first place and I would have it coming if I did a Lex Fridman and tried to force it anyways.