For me, it's the stigma that makes it a disability. There's exactly two sides of me, depending on who I'm with, and how I'm being perceived. If I lived on top of a mountain, it wouldn't be a disability. Just another form of personality. But sadly, humans exist. And for some of them, I am glad they exist.
Long comment ahead, but I started writing, it got out of hand, and I didn't want it to go to waste.
When I'm alone, I am the happiest person in the world, but also the loneliest. I desperately want to be with other people, sharing all the wonderful things I do and enjoy so much with others. I truly enjoy my life, but I hate the fact I have to do everything behind closed curtains. I can still be like this around certain people. Some people see me for the first time, and like what they see in me. And it makes me so happy I have to contain my tears on the spot. It's at that point where I can function just as well as other people, AND still be around real human beings. It makes me want to hug the softest thing I can get my hands on.
But then there's the other side. This side makes me want to be alone above everything else. This too is when I'm with other people. People who will draw their conclusions about me at first sight. Not conclusions based on what they see in me, but conclusions based on what they can't see in me. They will judge me because they don't understand what they see. They expect me to be like everyone else they interact with, and when I'm not like that, they silently condemn me for it. And they think I don't notice this. But I do notice it. It screams at me, the weight of their judgement crushes me, leaves me unable to perform even the most trivial tasks. I can't even speak properly at this point. I just mumble, stutter, mix words together, I will rush over long, fragmented sentences at breakneck speeds just to get it over with, be done with it. I get why people do this. Some people fear what they don't understand. But I WANT to be understood more than anything else. It doesn't have to be like this! People have proven this again and again, you can give me a chance to open up, and I promise, I can be understood.
It's this horrible 'observer effect'. Almost a cruel joke: The simple act of seeing me as disabled WILL disable me. Call it what you will, observer effect, mental Heisenbug, but as it stands, people misunderstanding me will render me a wreck, and the fact it's completely unnecessary makes me sad.