Being Bipolar does not excuse abuse. But is such a messy illness. It takes a lot of work, but with proper treatments and mood stabilizers you can have a normal life. The manic rage and violence CAN get better. This in no way means that you have to sacrifice your well-being to be a part of your wifes struggles and hopefully journey to better health. It’s okay to put yourself first.

Now, I wanted to just pop in to say.. Regardless of her state and actions, playing tricks on someone clearly involved in a bad episode is really not okay. You are just instigating with a very fragile and chaotic person who is not in control of themselves. You will not win with someone in a severe episode. Tricking them, lying, and even defending yourself verbally will likely escalate their mania rage. It could be dangerous for her, yourself, and your daughters.

Im really sorry you are going through this, I have left a few partners because I couldn’t handle their illnesses with my own and it is never easy. I wish you the best.

I’m bipolar. I’m learning “radical acceptance.” My mental health takes ongoing consistent care. My partner has rage issues, we recently had a period where we were having extremely toxic explosive angry arguments daily. We were just continuously throwing negativity at each-other and it became a vicious cycle. It took me a while to realize that if one of us (I took it upon myself) just kept their mouth shut and let the other person feel how they needed to feel, and attempted to de-escalate the argument rather than fighting back and throwing verbal jabs to hurt the other, that the episodes got better, and easier. Now the relationship is doing so much better as a whole. I was also getting severe panic attacks from the episodes and tension. I took a hard look at how I could help the situation, how I handle MY anger, and how I contribute to these upsets. Instead of trying to make things better, I was just wallowing on how “awful” I thought my partner was. I feel better about myself now, and her. Turns out when people don’t feel heard it causes more rage and resentment. It turns out hurt people, hurt people. I’m not comparing or saying this is your case, I just wanted to share my recent experience.

Being bipolar is hard. Dating bipolar is hard. I don’t think there is a clear answer here. I think everyone would agree it’s time to put you and your kids first. Sometimes people wont work on their mental health the way they should. That is their burden, and doesn’t have to be yours.

Thanks for reading haha