Yeah, traditionally you’re not supposed to throw your own shower. My mom made and sent my invitations from her address. I did have a dilemma because I live in Cali, my family lives in Florida, and his in NY. We decided to throw it in NY because he has a larger family and it is where we all grew up. I was a little bitter about having to fly cross country 7 months pregnant in the dead of winter but his family was very generous. My moms sister and my cousins are in NY and although they don’t speak, my mom made it clear it was my decision whether to invite my cousins are not. I decided not to because ive been on the other coast for so long anyway. It’s sad that your family is preventing you from having a shower and it seems a little selfish, although I don’t know the nature of the feuds. If you haven’t tried, I think you should make a list of who you would actually want to come to your shower and try to run it by the relatives. The ones who are adamant and bitter don’t have to come. You could be pleasantly surprised. I had some kinks to work through with my own shower but it worked out great.

Without a shower, only your closest friends are gonna really get you stuff. I flew all the way cross country to get that extended-family present-windfall experience. Now I’m fully stocked !