I am dealing with something similar at the moment. Broke up 2 weeks ago for the final time (she must have broken up with me at least 7-8 different other times since April, always to get back together) It started during COVID. I’m immune compromised, so I’ve been taking the pandemic quite seriously. She would go out with her friends, who had either returned from vacations, or just not taking the whole things seriously - and it turned into me being too “controlling” by simply expressing that I did not feel comfortable seeing her for a couple weeks, unless she could “quarantine”. I tried expressing my discomfort with her still texting guys she met off tinder before we’d met, and interacting with her “abusive exes” (which the story changed on these guys so much..I don’t even know) - that had been me being too “controlling” and then she’d break it off again. All for trying to communicate how kind of hurtful it felt that she speaks so ill of these people, yet still wants to interact? That still doesn’t make much sense to me, anyway.. The actual break up - her going to a party, one that the host and other guests had expressed they did not want her there, but she went anyway? Not just a freakin’ party during a pandemic, but one that no one wanted her at - apparently due to a guy she slept with, and was uncomfortable with her being there (from what she had explained). I’d reached out to someone I’d thought was a mutual acquaintance to try and figure out what was going on - she’d been upset, and on top of that talking to another tinder guy that day - and I was mentally gone. He’d screenshotted my message and texted it to her and all their friends, and honestly, there was nothing to hide or strange about it - but that led to even her friends deeming me the same way - “controlling”. I’m not perfect, and I understand others aren’t either. I know that maybe sometimes I can harp - but that’s because I was attempting to communicate with someone who was not willing to listen and understand what I was trying to express. They’d just get defensive inside their “perfect, no wrong-doing” bubble and blow up and project things to make them my own fault. Sometimes, people can’t or don’t want to communicate. Sometimes people are just straight up fucking selfish. That can honestly drive you to feel crazy sometimes, especially when you’re attempting to understand the other side, but they don’t want to hear it. It’s frustrating. I’m sorry your going through this, friend. We all are. Let’s keep moving forward together. I don’t know if my comment helped - but I’m wishing you well <3