I want to share my perspective that will hopefully be comforting to you.

I am a-type with a lot of anxiety - fear of failure has chilled my action to a glacial pace. We didn't move to our land until my child was already a year old. We haven't and probably won't have any more children because I now know what my ability is to handle an infant on top of all of the everything else I need to do.

We haven't yet had chickens, or goats or sheep despite being on our land for over 4 years now and despite how useful the goats would be, because I lack confidence that I can properly manage them - losing an animal to a mistake or ignorance would crush me.

That's not to say there hasn't been progress but most of that is thanks to my spouse who has had a more flexible work situation than myself for the entirety of our time here, but if I "wanted to" I could drop it all and do it if i wasn't clinging to the security of a job I know.