Nooo, I wasn't trying to one up you! I hope you don't feel that way - I have no idea what you suffer on a day to day basis. I just learned to take it in stride and I figured out the hard way that about 99% of the population really does suck. :P I keep to myself these days, because even the people I considered "friends" would screw me over if I gave them the chance.

Anyways, I just wanted to let you know you aren't alone <3 Dark days suck so much, but I try to let optimism outweigh my pessimism on most days - if I can avoid people, I do xD

Shit these days, I bawl my eyes out over Disney movies I have seen a thousand times, random reddit posts, I don't know. The human experience is a hard thing for people like me (and I am going to assume you) to live through. I totally understand why that one lady poured bleach into her own eyes, ya know? But suicide... suicide is THE END. I can't say if there is another life after this one but as shitty as it may get sometimes, everyyyy now and then a glimmer of something good gets tossed my way and makes me think maybe I can do this after all.

I hope something like that comes along for you soon, I'll be thinking of you from time to time for now on and be wishing good things your way. I do think the universe works in a particular way, but it is still that big mystery. Finding the will to carry on is a hard thing to do, and you have to want to do it first and foremost. I am glad you replied to me though, I don't get many chances to talk about stuff like this IRL so I am hoping in some way we can both benefit from this.

But as cliche as it may sound, I really am worried about you, stranger. You've struck a chord with me and my heart hurts for you because it knows the hurt.

I am so sorry for rambling. I tend to do that a lot.