Being read and treated as a woman generally sucks if you're aware of the bigger picture and what's going on.

I just feel a kind of disgust at being one sometimes.

I feel disgust towards both manhood and womanhood, and I think they're prisons imposed on overly generalized body types at birth.

I only transitioned because of sex dypshoria and reproductive dysphoria. The body I was born with was most definitely the wrong body. I know what body was meant to be mine and that's called AFAB. So my goal has always been to move towards having an AFAB body. As a result, like how you might be feeling, that entails a lot of bullshit with it. If I wasn't raised a feminist maybe I'd be oblivious, but I'm very aware of things going on.

The reality of being female just seems repulsive to me, especially the social and biological role expected- I want no part of any of that.

Do you have dysphoria over your body as it feels wrong and would feel wrong if there was no other humans alive? Or do you feel repulsed by all the assumptions that are heaped onto that body type?

It actually pleases me to be mistaken as male, or to be called male without having told the other person first.

Because you want a male body? or you identify with men, or because you feel like you're escaping the bullshit that comes with being born AFAB?

This is why I recently choose to identify as genderqueer. I've really struggled with saying transgender. I don't feel like I have a gender identity, just a sexed identity for my body and means of reproducing. Woman is a political label I have to wear now because of how female bodies are treated, and apparently I pass as AFAB to the point I don't have much of choice but to think critically about what it means to be seen as a "woman." I definitely did not identify with women nor have a target goal of being one. This was entirely body dysphoria, but now that I'm here I feel compelled to pick up the fight standing next to other female bodies already there.