She was hot, she was very hot, and that's really all I cared about.
Everywhere I went, people would check her, out guys always tried hitting on her, people were always super nice.
I liked that by the way. I never got jealous, I thrived off having guys hit on her.
But in all honesty, she wasn't that intelligent, lacked ambition, and didn't really strive for anything in life. She wasn't a bad person, in the sense of like evil; she just wasn't a great person, as in someone who I liked being around and talking to.
I put up with it though, and just told myself it was okay because she was unbelievably hot, and that is no one else's fault but mine, but because of this the relationship just drove me to the ground.
Disregarding the lack of intellectual conversation, the sharing of goals, ambitions and ideas for her beauty over time just made me in return more vain of person.
It took me a long time to really start understanding and being attracted to someone for who they are. I can assure you it's not easy, it takes maturity, perhaps some eye awakening vanity, but god damn it feels good to be and love someone that literally just fucking gets you.
There's a lot of people here who are going to start arguing looks matter and all that shit, but to me it's just sugar in the coffee. It makes it a little sweeter but it's the caffeine you're really after. If not then just eat a bowl of sugar and feel like shit like me.
It may be because times are different, and things like online dating and tinder and shit are more prevelant, but yes I can tell if someone is good looking from a picture, but how can you say they're attractive from not seeing them in person?
From hearing how they talk, to the way they carry themselves, the way they walk, the way they look at you when their listening, or seeing their awareness for children, or birds, or watching what type of food they order or seeing the current book she's reading in her purse, or the perfume she's wearing.
I'm fucking rambling now and I'm sorry, but it pains me sometimes, y'all. People today focus too much on the visuals. It's because they're lazy, and don't want to put in the effort to find out what really makes a person a person.
An old friend of mine told me back in the day people never had this problem, people didn't strain so much on looks because for the most part everyone was on the same scale.
In the same sense it took a WHOLE LOT to make someone really attractive, it also took a WHOLE LOT to make them unattractive. With everyone on the same playing field in that sense people connected on deeper levels of intuition, beliefs, and all that jazz.
Okay singing off now.