3. I have discovered a way to abolish the TSA, make all airports 100% safe, cut dow...

I have discovered a way to abolish the TSA, make all airports 100% safe, cut down on travel times, and save billions of dollars.

Okay, let me set up a little movie for you guys.

Fades into local coffee shop

"So I was like, bekeh, omg steve didn't even respond to my text."

"Ugh, Sarah, that is soooooooo rude. Steve is a jerk. Last time he texted me, he was like 'wan sum fuk?' and I was like UHH NO BETCH, I don't."

"Heh, totally Bekeh. I get you!"

Door bursts open

"ALLUH AKBAR!!!! I am going to blow you all up!"

"NO!"

"FUCKING NO YOU TACKY PIMPLE FACE BETCH!"

"I am Raja! I come to blow you all up in the name of Halal!"

"Firstly, betch, I have a nail appointment at 3, so you will not be blowing anything up until after I leave. Secondly, your shoes don't match your outfit."

"But I am Raja and I come to bl-"

"Stop. Fucking stop. Do you see this bracelet I have around my wrist? Ya, it like means like, you cant blow me up.. and stuff, so respek that. Fuck u betch. Let's go Sarah."

Sarah and Bekeh walk out

Police then come and tackle him

"Why didn't you blow anyone up?"

"She had a bracelet!"

The end

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