America has problems. Lots and lots of problems. So, having said that:

complete lumpen, blinkered, cluelessness of the average American who has grown so fat, so incurious, so passively xenophobic, and so aggressively ignorant, brutally disinformed, and thoroughly propagandized, that he can even ask that question-- because he literally has no clue why other countries could be so critical.

Fuck you you self righteous, arrogant, self-aggrandizing, self-important, generalizing asshat. You believe the "average American" is fat, ignorant, disinformed, propagandized, and xenophobic? Fuck you. No wonder you couldn't do better than sentence fragments, your head is too filled with hate.

America is only about two shades better than North Korea, Iran or Saudi Arabia in terms of abject despotism and the programming of the general population to remain completely oblivious to it.

That has to has to has to be a joke. NK is a third world country where the vast, vast majority of the population is starving. Most people in America are struggling with debt, not getting food. Again, fuck you. Let's add ill-informed to your personal list.

cowardly, servile and almost comically ineffective Left basically handed the country over to a bunch of psychopaths through sheer incompetence

Ya, can't really argue with that, except to point out that not everyone on either side is like that. Usually I don't feel the need to point that out, but you seem to have an issue with massive over-generalization.

And where were the Right during this complete takeover? The Right, who insisted the reason society has to bear the horrible human costs of being a Gun Country was so they could "defend against tyranny"?

We bear the horrible human costs of being a "Gun Country" because we believe that the government doesn't have the right to take that from us. Fuck, I'm usually all for gun regulation. But I would never go so far as to try and take everyone's guns.

Where were they while the military-industrial takeover was going down? They were in Texas, kicking their toes, shuffling their feet and muttering to themselves about how uncomfortable it still makes them that a pair of queers might want to get married somewhere. Know where they weren't? Anywhere near D.C. Because, at the end of the day, the Right are a bunch of gigantic pussies who never for even two seconds had the balls to take on the United States government the moment it became corrupt; the gunlust always was and always will be an infantile power fantasy; a security blanket you snuggle with at night because you've convinced yourself it will keep you safe from the monsters you imagine under your bed.

Again, pretty much no argument. Remember, not all republicans are like that.

But most Americans are not on Reddit; they're busy watching football, hating gays/blacks/women, and shitting their pants because a brown person said something in Arabic while standing in line next to them in the Starbucks.

Oh, thank god. I was worried you'd go a few points without saying something hatefilled and wrong. Fuck you. Most americans are not racist, are not reactionary. Most of us do like football, I'll give you that. Most americans are good people. Most people are good people. In your arrogant need to be better than people you don't know shit about, you've made the biggest mistake you accuse us of. You uniformed, blatant xenophobe.

You know why so many americans think we're the greatest country in the world? It's to balance out extremists like yourself, who think it's on the level of north korea. On average, taking your ill informed opinions and theirs, maybe it's close to the truth.