Dad is an elder (congregation secretary). I give him what for on occasion, but he’s my dad, I still love him. I have pushed as far as I think I can without a mental health professional’s assistance. Father flat out refuses to ever meet with a psychologist, even though he’s more than familiar with the science.
Wronging? Nope, never with my own dad, only be usual family level stuff that is inherent in how JWs break down the family unit to isolate lines of influence.
You need to understand, there are social consequences and there are legal consequences to “wronging”. Social wronging the elders will flock to each other, because any circuit overseer is going to analyze the issue and see that they can just point to the “Satan” concept and say “well, Satan made him do it.”
Legal consequences would mean being physically assaulted or otherwise threatened. I’ve been threatened by elders over non-JW issues, I didn’t make it legal because that isn’t my style and I can’t say I’d disagree with his reaction if I made the choices in life he did. That said, if an elder makes a public problem for the WTBTS “brand”, they’ll be dropped quickly as “unqualified.” The only complication is if they are an elder with legal responsibility for the local Kingdom Hall - a corporate board member of the non-profit. If one of those “corporate elders” makes trouble, you’ll get a visit from a branch or Bethel representative, and there will be some serious discussion about dropping that elder if the problem cannot be contained through their own legal team.
You won’t see elders take sides on an issue with a corporate elder because of the branch/Bethel level interactions. A public marking talk, a bunch of elders meetings, a lot of gossip making the rounds because of elderettes needing to know why their husbands have to meet an extra night or two that week.
Lastly, “taking action.” I like to think of our overall /r/exJW/ contribution is the best action we can, as a collective, take. We invest in identifying issues and fixing each other around here. It’s a much better preaching work, and this way my relatives don’t need to “witness” my apostasy and act overly shocked when I’m around. Life is still compromise outside the BOrg ;)