Here are my thought about this...

Up until like a couple years ago (I'm 23) "identity" was synonymous to me with "what you are." Ever since I was little I've been asked "what are you" and my answer has pretty much always been "Black, French, Native American, Irish, Mexican" because that's what I am. I never felt the need to have to choose to "be" something (except sometimes on forms or something which is annoying) and I just "be" me. When my parents, especially my mom (from Mexico), tried to push me in learning more Spanish or partake in more "Mexican" things like traditions or food, I always resented it because her only reason for doing was "because I'm Mexican." "So what?" If I don't like something (like Spanish) I'm not going to do it just because of some arbitrary reason like that. I just do the things I like to do because I like them (languages, food, music, traditions, etc) and I don't do the things I don't like because I don't like them. What does "being Mexican" mean to me? Pretty much nothing. "Being black?" Nothing. Same with everything else. I am me. My DNA doesn't define me or (consciously) influence me in my decisions or what I do or don't do in life.

If a person "is" something ethnically/racially, they are that regardless of what they look like, what others think they are, or how they think or act. You don't need to change how you act or feel for others. If you want to connect more with "black people" that's fine, but you are the only one who has to be with you 24/7 so if you are just doing it because you feel like you have to, know that you are you regardless of what others think. Try not to worry too much about having to know certain things or be interested in specific stuff because others do, just be you.