OPS real life gf here! He Is a "nice man" as in retired fire fighter, very active inside his community as per plays,Uber driver, running a car seat installation and working part time at a are dealership.
BUT he is terrible to be around because of his attitude and behavior alone. Lost of things I haven't forgotten and are VERY hurt by that my husband agrees were out of line but downplays it when ever I being it up again. He HAS spoken to his father to "behave" and his father does "try" now to behave but I still after multiple scenarios just can't grow to like him. My husband is VERY forgiving and continues to scold his dad then forgive him because he doesn't want to loose him and I don't have a father which he brings up often to suggest "I don't know what it is like" to escape the topic. I always cry when he says that because I wish I had and even if I did I wouldn't want it to be someone like his father, to me he isn't worth being around. I'm always biting my lip holding in rage or honestly bursting out st him over trial things to vent. I'm still VERY pleasant though and go above and beyond by making 5 course meals and multiple types of dessert, creating a peaceful and comfortable spare room for him and his wife but on the inside I don't even want him here. Anyway ON TO THIS LIST.
When I had my baby he called to congratulate us and said "that bitch has more hair then I do"
When we went out for a nice walk on a crowded street, he stood behind us playing feet sounds off his phone.
When I complained once about wearing fake eye lashes he pipped up and said "I bet that's not the only thing that's fake"
When my husband and I first started dating we got in to a fight and I stormed off very angry. Once I returned to talk to my husband his father came outside and told us "maybe it's time we cut our losses"
Once I was talking about some random skin tag within my dogs fur and his father chimed in and said "I also know what skin tags are but we call them tits"
His father's spouse has confined in me that he was slapping his gf s asses when they came over for bookclub and that he was terrible with money and she felt very heavy because he had no savings and was also hurt he watched porn and honestly the way he talks about wen in general is gross.
Going out to eat with him is brutal. He ALWAYS glances at the women's beasts and recently did a commercial for some low budget thing and you can actually pause the moment he stares at her chest while she's lowering the food while everyone else is conversing it's embarrassing how well you can call.or tell when "his jokes" are going to come
Somehow every conversation - at some point he HAS to mention that a cute or very pretty women was there.. even when said stranger has nothibg to do with the story .. like why?
I love my husband and he has been trying to be more assertive to his father and when we try to talk about his dad it always ends up in a fight with my crying. I can't stand the man and he still wants a relationship with him. He constantly forgives him because he says his dad has done a lot for us to make up for the fact he took the bike. But yet still no bike. His dad has come up to help with yard work and given is some of his old furniture that my husband chalks up to him trying to get on my good side and trying to change but honestly with everything also not mentioned that I am bothered by I would be happy never seeing him again and we are a very large point because he wants his dad inside our daughters life and I want him nowhere near me but I put up with his dad EVERY time my husband wants to see him and I feel like even typing this my husband will get upset and think I'm just out to make his father look bad but his dad does that on his own.
So here they come for dinner. Wish me luck. I still need to go wash the sheets for the spare bed and put on a brand new duvet I bought JUST FOR THEM so they can be comfortable ... thanks reddit for all the advice tho. Husband I love you but your dad is always going to be the same guy we are constantly let down by.. OMI