I'm sure many relatives to infirm or disabled people would agree, family says a lot of things about helping out and being supportive, but often don't follow through.

This is the case in many situations. A lot of people "offer" to help, but they don't actually mean it. They "offer" so they can absolve themselves of guilt. However, when somebody really needs help, these people have a million excuses, such as, "Any other time, I'd be happy to babysit, but this week just isn't good for me." And "Wish I could help you out, but I'm swamped with work right now!"

Fuck, even I do that at times, when someone asks me for help to move or whatever. Sometimes I actually DO have the time to help, but I just don't feel like doing it. I'm tired; I have plans; I have a deadline coming up; and sometimes, I just don't want to because I want to relax and lounge about.

But as a mother myself, I know that there is a difference between, "Hey, can you babysit my kid Saturday night?" And "Help me. I can't take this anymore." Those don't have to be the exact words, but you can generally tell by someone's tone of voice that they are fed-up and done.

In the first case, I will oblige whenever possible. Parents need breaks. In the second case, I will drop whatever the fuck I'm doing and care for a child whose parent is obviously exhausted and having a breakdown. Sometimes, the two situations are hard to distinguish. But please, if someone asks for help with their child, help them. If you are unable, do whatever you can to help find others who can help, or resources that they can use to get some help.

This is particularly important for mothers who have had an infant within the last two years. Post-partum depression and psychosis is a very real condition.