Wow I'm sorry you guys have had these experiences. I forced myself to get over this fear early, even though it was pretty miserable. I always found Aerie to be one of the best stores and most accommodating too.

Like, I got so used to the question "do you want a gift receipt?" that I just internalized it. Then finally, around the 3rd month of HRT one of the salesladies remarked: "Did you need a fitting room?" That was one of the greatest moments of my life.

I would definitely say that from an outsider's perspective the odd behavior caused by being nervous shopping for a bra is probably more attention-getting than being clocked male and shopping for women's undergarments. I suppose one mental trick to overcome the fear could be truly believing that you are buying this as a present? It's a present for you of course, but they don't need to know that.

I can say that eventually you do get comfortable and no one really stares anymore, but you have to keep exposing yourself to the challenging situation to arrive at that place.

Just remember: you are a valid customer and have every right to be there same as anyone else. You're not perving; you're just buying something you need.