So my friend works at Target...

>at work

>drank coffee for the first time that morning

>drank three cups to make sure it worked

>suddenly my stomach feels like someone has filled it with dirt and is trying to make a balloon animal with it

>literally feel the shit straining against my rectum, as if it was possessed by some sort 

of demon and wanted freedom from its thousand year prison

>have to walk down the hall with my ass and thighs clenched tightly

>by the time I get to the bathroom, I'm sweating profusely and grunting loudly with every step

>go to the nearest stall

>notice there is someone in the stall next to it, but idgaf

>yank down shorts and attempt to slam my ass onto the toilet seat

>ass slips off due to the slickness caused by my ass sweat

>fall off, one of my arms goes into the toilet, my ass slips under the stall divider

>can't control it

>shit actually explodes out of my ass, covering the entire stall

>its occupant starts screaming

>I start to scream in return, but I can't fucking stop

>goes on for about half a minute, shit erupting from my ass forcefully the entire time

>finally it dies down, ass still sputtering and oozing a bit

>person rushes out of the stall, almost slips on the shit, and then dashes out of the bathroom

>lie on the ground for five or ten minutes, just trying to recover

>finally, get up and look in the stall to inspect the damage

>it is completely lined with shit, you can even make out the outline of the previous 

occupant against the wall

>there is a gooey pile where my ass was sticking through, probably weighed at least five pounds

>wipe my ass as fast as I can, still takes a long time

>terrified someone would walk in at any moment
/r/WTF Thread Link -