i was talking about the same thing with my brother who is a philosophy major. he says there is no right or wrong way to go about the whole ordeal. some people visit and some do not. some find it too difficult to go and who are we to blame them? we are all individual people with our own thoughts, feelings, and life experiences.

i used to be upset that while he left and went to college i was stuck at home caring for our mom and put my entire early adulthood on pause and caused me great emotional difficulty. i was so angry with him but then i realized he was right. there is no right or wrong and who am i to judge someone in pain who is trying their best.