This is going to be downvoted to hell but here it is: I'm an outlier on reddit in that I don't like porn, I don't think it's healthy and I don't want a partner who watches it.

I had a similar awful experience to you with an ex who treated me in the same way you explained and I have had some major road blocks getting close to someone again because of that. I know now that I need a particularly considerate person to respect my specific boundaries or I am just not my best self in the relationship (i.e. psycho cunt). You have a right to clearly define what you know you want and need in your relationships and they have a right to take it or leave it. This sounds crazy but there are, in fact, guys out there who don't or won't watch porn and will be willing to be in a relationship without it. In my opinion, if their masterbatory habits are more important than you or your feelings, then they can kick rocks.

Currently I am dating someone who independently told me he doesn't like or watch porn early on in our relationship and I've never been happier or had more or better sex in my life before.

I'm just saying this because I sense you think you have to be ok with it just because that's the consensus you get from a community like reddit, but keep in mind this is a skewed demographic specifically on this issue. If you're not comfortable with something, there's nothing wrong with asking for that and I assure you there are other people out there who feel the same and won't make you feel like shit. You deserve to ask for and get what you want including someone who can be considerate to your past scars and traumas which should NOT be trivialized.