Do you have a clinic you take her to for OT or that sort of thing? Maybe it would be worth discussing with her social worker if you have that? I have a special needs son and there's a clinic with programs like how to teach toileting or how to help prepare for school for parents of kids with more interesting challenges.

There have been many times when we've encountered a problem with medical stuff or schooling where I kind of unload on the worker and they know who to put me in touch with to help navigate the problem. You're certainly not alone in your concerns about what will happen to your child if you aren't there for her anymore, so there must be resources or plans available to look at, and a clinic like an autism clinic (CHEO, McMaster, Lansdown, etc) might be able to help you look in the right direction.