When you die and people do the whole performative caring thing, it's not for your sake (you're dead) - they're just milking your misfortune for virtue-signalling. If anything, you should live out of spite - deny them their supply of attention!

Keep in mind also, people only ever offer the promise of help for things they think they might want help with, while hoping they will be able to get away with not providing what they promised. So you'll hear "I'm always just a phonecall or message away!" and they never pick up and take 3-5 weeks to reply to a message with a non-answer. It all makes sense, remember what selective pressures designed them over the last 5bn years: survival of the fittest.

Sometimes the most selfish for a human being to do is help/cooperate, which explains the existence of benevolence and philanthropy. Just because it is sometimes convenient and useful for somebody to help you, you can't expect them to keep any of their promises - you need to learn to think in terms of what value you are able to provide in exchange. The less your own value in terms of social/financial/political/etc wealth, the lower your credit score, and thus you should treat your interactions as the social equivalent of "cash only".