You can overeat a few times in your life without being obese- and no one ever talks about some sort of gluttany virginity. If you are obese, you can lose the weight, and all is forgiven. You cannot take back your virginity.

The reason why the Bible is obsessed with virginity, is the same reason many cultures then were. Virginity is how you track paternity, and paternity determines inheritance.

So virginity is really about money transfers.

Today, we have birth control and paternity tests, so we don't functionally need virginity to track inheritance.

Remember- grace and forgiveness are also values of the bible.

Not everything is about what you specifically are attracted to. The pastor doesn't need to preach to large audiences about what some kid Jim feels with his dick.

The pastor should preach to the WOMEN too, whose actual lives and self esteem are impacted by the sermons more so than what you specifically fetishize.