Sorry you're dealing with this. For now don't allow the "boner police" to watch you while you're holding your child. The whole thing is ludicrous. No counseling needed for you - She needs to let go of her fixation on this , likely through counseling for her anxiety. I was an overprotective parent with my first as well - I hardly let anyone hold my baby. So I get it. But false accusations are another level. She needs to recognize that she's taking it too far. Alienation from the father is not good for her child. Plus as a new mother she needs the father to help, to do his part. You're right to demand she gets counseling. Best of luck to all 3 of you