I feel the same way but I'm younger but will still probably end up in the same boat as you. There are a lot of people saying most people don't date till their older which is true if you're that kind of person but I'm not. I hold my first kiss or nothing else like that sentimentally. I always imagine when I'm invited to a party where girls will be (about 1 time a year which sucks all on its own) that I'll meet someone that seems nice and do whatever together and hang out and just have a good time and both be happy and then move on until we meet again. I don't want the whole thing where we awkwardly meet and then one day I work up the courage to kiss her (mostly because no girls hang around me or the people I hang around with so this won't happen). But just like OP I'm a pretty average guy, despite how this whole thing makes me sound I get along with people well and actually am pretty good around girls. For example I went to homecoming with a group after one of my friends talked me into it and had a great time and everyone seemed to not be bothered having me around. I was dancing with this one girl and she said, "You're really fun to be around!" And this really made my day. Of course then we get back into the normal school schedule and she doesn't even look at me in the hallways and it's like she doesn't even remember me (I wasn't hitting on her or anything weird and she didn't want to date me or anything but I think after a comment like that I might have actually made a friend or something). And because all of this I always have this feeling in the back of my head that everyone actually really hates me and just acts nice to me because they feel bad for me but then make fun of me behind my back. Then I stay up at night not being able to sleep thinking about all the tiny dumb things I've done that would make them hate me that in reality they probably don't even remember me doing it (actually what I'm doing right now). Sorry about this whole long stupid rant but I'm just laying here unable to sleep and I thought I'd come here after all this time and see what people are up to. Saw someone who had a situation similar to one of mine and saw an opportunity to vent and just kind of exploded it all out here. Well sorry you had to read all this stupid shit and have a good night everyone :P.