If you are currently going through this tragedy, I'd like to offer my condolences.

I lost my father (42 at the time) after a year long battle with cancer when I was just 15. I was the oldest in the family and things seemed to slow down for about 6 months after. Luckily for us, we were prepared for it. When you catch cancer in stage 3 and you find out it progresses to stage 4, you get some time to mentally ready yourself for the inevitable.

As for the loss itself, everyone goes through completely different things. I personally felt like it was a call to action for me. I had become the man of the house overnight and felt like my family needed me more than I needed them. I helped with a lot of the details (funeral and stuff) spoke at the funeral and lent an ear for anyone who needed it. Don't get me wrong, I was extremely sad, but I let it out in small doses later on because that's how I felt it was best to deal with it for me.

I felt like I needed to be brave. I didn't cry at the funeral, I hugged everyone and tried to bring up the things I loved most about my dad with other people when they were crying. This is by no means what everyone should do. Everyone should approach a loss of a family member however they would like. It's okay to be very sad, it's okay to feel vulnerable and weak, and most importantly, it's okay to either want to talk about it a lot, or not talk about it at all. Whatever helps you find peace. But that's the ultimate goal: to make peace with it. Nothing you ever do will bring them back physically, but that's okay. They lived and loved. And the best you can do is continue to live your life to the fullest, because you know that's what they would tell you if they could. It's been almost 9 years for me, but I still love reminiscing, looking at old photos, etc. It reminds me about what I was taught, how they affected my life and how to live my own life so as not to let their life go to waste.