I would say both.

Idk the reason why you cheated or are still cheating but imagine someone who cheats for the hell of it, just to cheat.

Someday he/she would maybe stop and maybe even end up in a relationshio that he is really invested in. How could this person really believe that his/her SO won't cheat because he/she did it so easily from the moral pov and the actually going through with it?

And I'd like to ask you the same question as I did to the other person on this thread.

If you have problems in the relationship that you can't get past without cheating then why are you still together?

Is it because of the kids? If so then don't you think that if (and lets not kid ourselves cheating comes to light no matter how long it takes) they found out about ut that they would actually dislike you kore then they would have ever if you would have divorced him/her instead?

And don't you feel in general guilty about this or about betraying your SO?

Sorry for asking all these questions it's jist that I found this sub recently and these are all questions which are going through my head.

I can understand that people have (emotional & sexual) problems in their relationships but why do they cheat instead of seperating/divorcing? It's unfair to everyone involved no matter what you want to reason it is and will stay (in my opinion) wrong.

Like I said I am only writing all this because this sub has basically blown my mind. I don't want to judge you and I'm sorry if any of this came out as judging or accusatory honestly I think I'm just more scared that the people I love and the people I care about do this so easily.

But then on the other hand people who care about me and who love me would certainly question me in a lotnofbways either but argh....

I don't know what I'm rambling about I'm sorry for letting this all out on you and in this thread.