Don't have a throwaway so here's hoping nobody I know starts reading :)

Dead fucking lonely, from the moment I wake up until the late hours where I physically can't keep my baggy eyes open any longer. I have family and friends, who I love dearly and couldn't live without, but I couldn't tell you the last time I had proper physical contact with another person.

Friends ask me why I don't date, and I always tell them what I keep telling myself: I don't feel ready. I feel like there are so many faults with myself that I don't want a potential partner to discover, so I go about trying to "fix" myself before I open up to anyone. It's like cleaning the apartment before you have friends over but every time you finish one spot, another one gets dirty again. It's not even like I'm not aware that nobody is perfect, I just feel like everyone else is more perfect than I am.