My father killed himself a few years ago over some really big personal issues in his life, without warning, no depression or anything like that. We were close, but not as close as I wish I would've been, he and my Mom divorced when I was 18, I'm in my 30s now, and he disappeared for about a year, like didn't contact me or my brother or anything... then popped up (I forget how) and had a girlfriend, she had a bunch of kids (none were his) and it was just strange... Made me and my brother really uncomfortable.
And with my Mom I don't really speak with her, she's fairly insane and unstable. My brother withholds his kids from her and doesn't allow her to be alone with his kids because of her personality. She can't go over to his house and visit when his wife is home, as they don't get along, and she's done way too much and said too many hurtful things to me, for me to want to rebuild our relationship.
The main way it's affected me, in that when I date someone, and go to meet their parents/family, I feel EXTREMELY uncomfortable to be in a family situation/setting. My family, from the time I remember was dysfunctional, ALWAYS yelling, ALWAYS fighting, my father watching TV in the living, my Mom in her room watching TV, never eating dinner together, everyone was silent. My fathers side of the family wasn't a part of my life (hell, his Mom didn't even go to his funeral and when I was down here on emergency leave from the military, NOT ONE person asked me and my brother if we needed help with a god damn thing), like his entire side because they didn't get along with my Mom. And my Mom's side of the family only had her brother (which we only saw on x-mas... but I haven't even seen him since I was 17, his mother just died, my gma, and he was nowhere to even be found or get ahold of to inform) and so x-mas as a kid was my Dad, Mom, her Mom, Her brother, and my brother (until I was like 12, then he disappeared and did his own thing because he was older). So I find my anxiety shoots through the roof during get togethers because I just don't feel comfortable, I don't know, it's hard to explain. I also never understand when people place so much importance on their parents opinions because I've always been responsible for myself and never had to lean on my parents for anything... I've had a very fucked up family life, I wish I had one that was supportive, it'd be awesome! I know when I just recently had to move in with my Mom while transitioning out of the military and getting a place of my own, and finding my military graduation picture tucked in the spare bedrooms closet... kinda summed up our relationship.