One of my fears (anxieties) about that is it already took over a month to get into this guy at a small place. It'll take 1-2 months to get into someone else. I mean he's not helping so if I quit going no loss really other than another body to talk to. I just know I need help. I've always had self worth issues (probably why I settled with her). A lot of days I'm not happy even before D-day. Etc. There's a decent amount from my past I should talk to someone about at some point. Explain this one to my chemically unbalanced brain. I am worried that but the time I can finally get into someone new I won't be anxious enough or whatever to feel like I need to go. I know I'm in a million pieces right now, but I'm hard and work picking them up. I know I won't find all the pieces and some if the glue just won't hold, but I'll be mostly whole again someday. Since posting to this reddit my anxiety has gone down some. I'm trying to post to others as much as I can contribute to pay it forward since all you kind people took time from your life to say kind things to a stranger that needed to read them.